GET MAD BUT DON'T GET IGNORANT PART IV

Hey Bruh! Competitiveness is an inherent characteristic in human beings that is responsible for creating an atmosphere conducive to the potential for violence! From the day we are born to the day that we take our last breath, we all must engage in fierce competition for what we want and need to survive! No! I’m not talking about the animal kingdom! I am talking about humans acting like animals! This kill or be killed, get them before they get you, shoot first, and forget about taking names mentality that is prevalent in this generation is the purist example of unleashed ignorance and misappropriated violence based on and driven by the unfulfilled need for attention!

Consequently, this is what happens when a certain dynamic that distorts perception, destroys connectivity and dislodges loyalty interrupts and/or interferes with personal relationships! This dynamic possesses the power to transform competitiveness into rivalry because a perception that has been distorted makes people take offense to everything or makes them take things personally! That dynamic is called jealousy! Jealousy taints every detail of the way people who are held captive by this disposition live! It affects who they are, what they say, what they do, and where they go all the while cultivating an appetite for vengeance and an atmosphere for violence! Consequently, this is the reason why a jealous person’s gift will always be unacceptable!

The anger that jealousy provokes is ignorant, malicious, and inevitably homicidal! Especially when envy’s gifts don’t meet the standard and envy’s best is not enough! It creates a hater’s mentality and that takes sibling rivalry to a whole new level! When you hate your brother because you don’t want to do what is right or in other words, if you hate your brother without a cause, you are or will become a murderer! This is the issue that we as humans have today because, at every level of society, anger controls us, ignorance defines us, and the use of misappropriated violence in some form or fashion seems to be the only way we know how to solve our problems and that is because of the ignorance of jealousy! This is what I call the “Cain Mentality!”

The “Cain Mentality” is defined as the longing to have your gifts, talents, ideas, and actions recognized, prioritized, and accepted because you think they are the most appealing and the most effective! They are the correct answer to the question, the only solution for the problem, and they are the perfect offering for the sacrifice because they are the best thing that Cain has to offer! The problem with this mentality is that it is not and will never be acceptable! Now listen, I didn’t say accepted. I said acceptable! Let me explain!

UNACCEPTABLE 

Have ever received a gift from someone on Christmas, on a birthday, out of friendship, or out of respect and that gift didn’t meet your standard, but you accepted it anyway to show your appreciation! Let me ask you a question; What did you do with it? If it was an article of clothing or a piece of jewelry, did you wear it, put it in a closet or jewelry box purgatory, or did you throw it away? Now regardless of what you did with that gift, the reason that you accepted it is that although it didn’t meet your standard, that gift or the giver didn’t offend you because of the spirit in which it was presented!

In other words, people will accept a gift that doesn’t offend them even if they don’t like, want, or need it because the giver was trying to be nice, and they don’t want to hurt people’s feelings! However, if the gift that you were presented with made you feel slighted, disrespected, appalled, or mocked you would immediately refuse that gift, the giver's feelings be damned! Why? Well, there are a variety of reasons for that but suffice it to say that the gift, the giver, or both did not meet your standard or offended you and that made the gift unacceptable! To sum things up, just because a gift is accepted doesn’t mean that the gift is acceptable. However, when a gift is unacceptable, it cannot and will never be accepted!

The Cain Mentality provokes dissension and pits brother against brother in a battle that leads to murder! At the beginning of this dysfunction, the brother that is not jealous has no clue that he is hated or that his character is being assassinated behind his back! Unfortunately, in most cases that brother won’t find out before his jealous brother rises up against him and takes him down! But if and when that brother who is the target of the other brother’s jealousy finds out before he gets taken down this will become a war of epic proportions!

The ignorance of jealousy is manifested in the streets of our nation every day! Young men and boys are killing each other for and in retaliation over money from the drugs they sell which is both killing their brothers and sisters and destroying their neighborhoods! Here is the biggest reason why they are so angry and so violent. It is because they are jealous of the brother who finished high school then went to college, got a degree, and who is now a corporate executive! Or the brother who got a job at the local plant right out of high school and the brother who has a stable career after learning the skills of a trade and who are both making union wages!

All of them can afford a lifestyle that the jealous want and desire! Ironically, those who are jealous are as gifted and talented as the brothers that they are jealous of, or at least they think they are! But because they want to do things their way and they think that their way is just as good if not better, they choose to live in a life-or-death situation and they get angry at the world because their way is and will always be unacceptable! They don’t want to go to school, learn a trade, work in a corporation, or work in a factory. They don’t want to work for anyone or at all for that matter! In other words, they don’t want to do it the right way, so they turn to criminality to make their fortune. Just how ignorant is that? This is the legacy that this generation has left! That means things will only get worse if we don’t do anything about it! That would be a tragedy and a tragedy would be unacceptable!

GET MAD BUT DON'T GET IGNORANT: Part III

ON DISPLAY

Hey Bruh! I believe in non-violent resistance, civil disobedience, and “getting into good trouble” to quote the late Civil Rights icon and the 17-term Congressmen from Georgia John Lewis! I agree with it wholeheartedly, however, it is not for me! Why? Because I have never been the kind of man who would let anyone slap, kick, punch, or spit on me because I’m black or for that matter, any other reason, then just stand there and take it! Now I will admit that this philosophy has its merits and has slowly but surely brought about some changes in the world and the United States.

On the other hand, as it pertains to the Civil Rights movement, the sacrifices that our ancestors made did not secure lasting change. We know this because we are still fighting that same old battle! The primary reason for this is that we keep using that same old weapon! Despite this truth and regardless of the way that I feel about this philosophy, I must give credit where credit is due and say that non-violence is an imperfect yet proper use of anger that has been on display for millenniums in this world and at least four hundred years in America, long before the United States of America became a country!

At the base of the philosophy of hegemony is the use of overwhelming force! In fact, when it comes to Geopolitics or the study of international relationships and the threat of war, the more political, economic, and military might a country has at its disposal, the more tentative its adversaries are and should be to try to engage in a physical conflict with them. This is what we call a cold war! In fact, this is the proper use of anger on display when it comes to the proliferation of conventional weapons and weapons of mass destruction!

Athletes must have that very same mentality when they participate in sports! Football and hockey are considered the most violent of the team sports, while MMA and Boxing top the list of individual full-contact sports. However, taking down your opponent or opponents by using overwhelming force is a part of athletics in general! That means that athletes at the risk of causing permanent damage and ending their or their opponent’s career must be able to walk into their perspective venue, turn on a switch, try to beat the mess out of each other, then turn off that switch, leave that venue, and go back to acting like normal people! That ironically is the proper use of anger on display!

The first part of Ephesians 6:4 says, And ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: This is a difficult area for me because I was not as successful with this as I should have and could have been! With that said, I would eventually learn that being firm, patient, understanding, and consistent is always more effective than the ignorance of yelling or shouting threats and condemnation that provoke children to wrath! While raising children, (your own, step, adopted, or foster), is never easy because they will do and say things that will make you angry, it becomes easier as you learn the proper use of anger because when you do it in love your children will receive correction and honor you when you get are older, not hate you and wish you were dead! We need to highlight those fathers and mothers for that matter a whole lot more so that this perfect example of the proper use of anger is on display!

The T-shirt dubbed “wife beater” has to be the most disgusting and disrespectful nickname that has ever been thought of and given in the history of mankind! The fact that both men and women proudly wear it knowing what it symbolizes has in some sick way romanticized domestic violence! But let's be clear, the T-shirt is not the problem and you can wear it if you choose! However, Real men don’t beat their wives and won’t allow themselves to get to that point because they have outlets for their frustration! Real men honor, protect, promote, respect, and cherish their wives!

I recently started to buy my wife flowers again because I realized that it had been a while, in fact quite a long time, that I loved on her in that way! I didn’t do that because I made her mad or we were arguing, I did it because she is the love of my life! That alone is reason enough! By the way, we like all couples have gotten angry at each other over our 27-year marriage, but we have never put our hands on each other! No one has the right to put their hands on anyone, especially their wife or for that matter their husband except in the case of self-defense! There are many examples of marriages and long-term relationships out there on display that can show us the proper use of anger!

Words can hurt longer than a wound that is caused by physical assault. Emotions run high when we go about our busy day but when you take the time to choose your words, they can calm a situation that is on the verge of turning ignorant! In fact, words are the gasoline or the water that gets poured on that fire, or words can both escalate and de-escalate conflict! If you are able to use your words to squash a beef, then you have used anger properly and violence was used appropriately! 

There are more examples of the proper use of anger and the appropriate use of violence on display in and around our lives. But, in answering the question of whether or not we have gone past the point of no return we must seriously consider the fact that yes, we probably have! However, let’s not allow that consideration to be an excuse to continue being ignorant! The “If things are not going to change why should I try” justification is not going to cut it because lives and livelihoods are at stake! We, both men and women, but particularly men need to step up because we have failed miserably in setting the right example for posterity to follow and now we have to go to them in that imperfection and try to save this generation from themselves! Why? Because the legacy that has been left by mine and preceding generations is one that is filled to the brim with willful ignorance and misappropriated violence!

GET MAD BUT DON'T GET IGNORANT: Part II

Hey Bruh! I am aware of what some people who knew me in the past and who know me now are going to say when they discover that I wrote this blog or after seeing the title. They will say something to the effect of; What! Or really! Why? Because I was a hot head, and to some degree I still am! The biggest difference between me back in the day and my contemporary self is that I have learned to use or rather I am still learning the proper use of anger! As both a teenager and a young man, I was mad every day! Mad at the world, my dad, and myself, and although I really didn’t know it, I was mad at God too! I fought or was looking for a fight all the time. If I wasn’t fighting, I would talk violently. If I wasn’t talking violently, I would be thinking violently. And because I thought, talked, and acted violently, there was no doubt in anyone’s mind that I was immature, foolish, and flat-out ignorant! The truth about this kind of mentality or disposition is that it will control your life and severely limit your livelihood if it is not dealt with properly! Why? Because anger is in our nature! That is to say; we were born with this emotion and since it never leaves us nor is it supposed to, just like any of our other individual emotions, if you do not control it, it will control you! That’s when ignorance takes over!

By the way, that was Cain's problem. Before he killed his brother Able, God came to Cain after he got mad when his gift was not acceptable and showed him how to properly use his anger. But to the demise of Able, Cain would not listen! We will breakdown Cain’s disposition in a proceeding post but for now, suffice it to say that Cain got mad, got ignorant, and intentionally misappropriated violence with a homicidal act that unleashed vengeance upon himself, from which his descendants to this day are still trying to flee! 

THE MISAPPROPRIATION OF VIOLENCE

I am also quite aware that the frequent use of the word violence in this post and in this blog will be triggering for many! As inartful and insensitive to them as it may seem, what I am going to try to convey to everyone here is that there are two domains in which violence will occur! One is spiritual, and the other is natural! However, I want to make myself clear when I say that abuse of any kind is wrong, unacceptable, and a crime in both of those domains! So, to misappropriate violence or to inflict spiritual, emotional, and physical pain on someone because you can, because you want to, and even if it’s the only thing you know how to do, is the definition of willful ignorance and is a manifestation of pure evil! Period!

The misappropriation of violence is nothing new! From the murder outside of the Garden of Eden to the mass casualty events of today, history is replete with example after horrible example of humanity at its absolute worst! In the United States alone, far too many of our citizens have unfortunately become victims of violence! However, just as regrettable is the fact that every one of us can bear witness to the rapid increase of misappropriated violence and in addition to that have had to suffer from the collateral damage that was inflicted on us by the perpetrators, as those acts of willful ignorance and pure evil have become commonplace in this country!

Anger permeates the very fiber of the American way of life because we are all human! But interesting enough, whether the violence that anger can ignite is misappropriated in the heat of passion, during an unfolding plot of domestic terror, or by someone with a serial mentality, we put every act of violence into the same box and call it mental illness! Certainly, no one in their right mind is going to commit an atrocity! On the other hand, most if not all of the people who have been diagnosed with or are suffering from mental illness are just trying to live a normal life and are not trying to harm anyone, and that includes themselves! So, the question you should be asking is “How do you know the difference?”

You will know you are on your way to understanding the principles of the proper use of anger when you begin to recognize the difference between anger provoked and ignorance unleashed! The difference is correctly appropriated violence is an effective instrument of peace, and conversely, when violence is misappropriated, it is a deadly weapon of destruction! For example, if I can defeat my adversary with my mere presence, then I know that I have appropriately used violence because it was more effective than a verbal threat or a physical assault! This means that I got mad, but I did not get ignorant! However, in a world that is full of violence or to be more accurate, in a world that is full of ignorance, the question now becomes; Where do you go to see an example of the proper use of anger on display?

THE LOVE OF MANY HAS WAXED COLD

I meant that sincerely! Where can you go in this world and find anger used properly? The answer to that question turns out to be very difficult to find and when you find it, the answer is very difficult to comprehend! This is because when it comes to human emotions; as time goes by, things stay the same! In other words, this is because human beings are angry! We always have been, and we always will be! In fact, the people that are a part of this generation or who are living on the planet right now are not just angry, they are angrier than ever before! Jealousy, hate, and insecurity are just a few of the emotional rollercoaster rides we strap in for or deal with daily that have totally reengineered the dynamics of interpersonal relationships or have completely changed the way that we treat one another!

To put it bluntly, we just don’t love each other like we should! Why? It is because in the name of individual rights, selfishness reigns, and being selfish does not allow you to “love your brother and sister like you love yourself!” Or prefer their rights wants, and needs over your own! That just doesn’t happen a lot, if at all anymore! Consequently, because “the love of many has waxed cold,” it is much easier for us as humans to get mad, get ignorant, and stay that way! That is why we see the hideous face of murder uncovered every time the ignorant make the declaration, “Am I my brother’s keeper?” We recognize that face because we have seen it in our own mirror when we got mad, got ignorant, and hated our brother and sister without a cause! 

Today, human beings have become implacable and are deviously malicious! In other words, we do not forgive, we hold grudges, and we plan or invent ways to hurt each other because we have hurt ourselves! This still happens even though it seems like everyone has a life coach or a counselor! How much money has been wasted on paying someone to tell you what you already know about yourself or on just talking for the sake of talking? Ironically, after all of that talking, some people will still be mad at something that happened or that they perceived to have happened to them 10, 20, and 30 years ago! Predictably, every time that they are triggered by it, they get mad, and they get ignorant! Hard to find the proper use of anger around them!

Today, human beings have become more prideful and deceitfully contentious! In other words, we think that we are better than everyone else, and we will lie, cheat, and steal to prove it! We will create a solution where there is no problem and start a fight to force compliance because we think that what we want is more important! Then we will control the narrative with repetitious mendacity to the point that we start believing our own lies and get violently ignorant when we are confronted with the truth! Hard to find the proper use of anger around them also! Now I could go on and on with examples of ignorance on full display but that’s not hard to find and that’s not what we are looking for! We need to see more of those who are in leadership at every level who are properly using anger being put on display so that the world can see and emulate them before we cross the line of no return! Or is it already too late?

GET MAD BUT DON'T GET IGNORANT: Part I

 “Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: Neither give place to the devil.” Ephesians 4:26-27

 Hey Bruh! There is always a cause and effect! This means, that in the world in which we live, there is a stimulus or there are stimuli that both demand and require a response! Every day we as human beings process these causes and respond to them in the way in which they affect us! This is because the complement of emotions that we are born with pretty much control how we respond to or rather, (if we are going to be truthful about it,) how we react to the stimulus or stimuli that we are confronted with! Nevertheless, that is not the way it is supposed to be!

We are indeed emotional beings, but we should not always be subject to the rollercoaster ride or to all the ups and downs that we are going to experience on this journey called life because of them! However, the impact of trauma and drama slowly weaponizes our feelings to the point that at times we become unbalanced! This means that all of us have triggers, but some people are not just triggered, they are trigger-happy! Consequently, the effect that is provoked by the cause from most of us is an irrational, unjustifiable, and at times irrevocable reaction! But for those who are trigger-happy, their provocation is a 24/7/365 disposition!

I think you will agree that anger is the most if not one of the most influential emotions in the complement that we were born with! Anger is expressed in many ways and unfortunately, it is the primary reason why people become isolated, feared, mistrusted, overlooked, ridiculed, incarcerated, and are rotting on death row! With that said, I want everyone to know that there is a difference between being provoked to anger and being a rageful or vindictive person! Unequivocally, you can have a bad day and say or do something in the heat of passion, but that does not mean that you are what you did! In fact, those who know you will confirm that what you said or how you acted on that day was out of character! But we all need to be reminded that there are people in this world and in our lives who are driven by uncontrollable anger or are full of rage, who cannot do or say anything that is not vindictive, and who cannot be anything other than ignorant!

The first part of Ephesians 4:26 says, “Be ye angry, and sin not!” The name of this blog is, “Get Mad, But Don’t Get Ignorant.” This is my transliteration of that part of the scripture from King James English into our language to try to create a popular expression! However, what I want you to know is that the intent of both this scripture and this blog is to introduce the concept and to teach the principles of the proper use of Anger! We need to understand and then implement these principles to be effective in recovering and retrieving the things that have been stolen and that have been lost so that we have a proper legacy to leave for the next generation!

Now I am writing this blog for the masses! This is to say, that in writing this blog my intention is to try to reach everyone but in particular, what is most important to me, is that I am writing this blog for my brothers! For men far and wide whose instinct is to fight! Ok, I hear you! But I am not trying to imply or deny that women can fight! My wife and I are the parents of three daughters, and I know that all four of them can and will fight if necessary! Additionally, I grew up with and around some women who fought like men, and I was thankful that some of them were my own sisters and others were good friends! However, it is a well-documented truth and a historical fact that whether their reputation was famous or infamous, men were born to fight! So let me reiterate, I am writing this blog for the masses, both men and women, but again what is most important to me is that I am writing this blog for my brothers! I apologize if I offended anyone with that statement however, there is a time and a purpose to everything under the heavens!

What better time is there to redirect or to help men gain a proper understanding of the use of anger than right now! Why? It’s because if you don’t know or won’t acknowledge the purpose of a thing, you will inevitably abuse it! Consequently, because of the lack of understanding and the willful disregard for the purpose of a thing, men have abused everything in the name of Manhood! That is not the way it is supposed to be, and this mentality must change! Why? Because the proper use of anger is the cure for what ails this world and without it, the misappropriation of violence will continue!

“The kingdom of heaven suffereth violence, but the violent take it by force!” Matthew 11:12 KJV. The NASB transliterates the last declaration of that verse to say: “AND VIOLENT MEN TAKE IT BY FORCE!” So now is the time to make this principle clear to the masses and particularly to my brothers so that we, both men and women, can take back what has been stolen and retrieve what has been lost together before it is all said and done! Secondly, it is out of necessity that those principles need to be on display to introduce to some and to remind others that as a man the misappropriation of violence is not and should not be what defines masculinity however, it is only when men understand the proper use of anger that violence is appropriate in circumstance, in measure, and is exponentially more effective than the actions of the ignorant!