THE CAIN MENTALITY: THE CONCEPT AND LEGACY

HEY BRUH! Today, I present to you Part II in this series I call The Cain Mentality! In Part One I defined what the Cain Mentality is and how to identify that disposition! So, it’s my privilege to share with you the concept of this mentality by first explaining who Cain was, is, and always has been. Secondly, by describing how his presence endured throughout history, and lastly, by showing you the impact that his presence has had on society from generation to generation! Alright! Let’s get started!

I want to begin by stating the obvious! Cain the actual is dead! In other words, the man in a story from the Bible who killed his brother because he was jealous is not alive anymore and has been dead for over 5,000 years! I would be very surprised if someone in 2023 didn’t know that! However, with that knowledge comes a boatload of questions! The first one is and should be; If Cain the actual died over 5000 years ago, how could his presence have been pervasive over the last 5000 years later!

THE LEGACY OF A REBEL! 

The answer to that question is both simple and complex! The answer to that question, my brother, is legacy! Legacy is the impact, influence, and impression a progenitor has on their progeny which is what connects them to posterity, or in other words, the essence of who you are that is left as an heirloom to be passed on from one generation to the next! Legacy is the traditions, values, faults, strengths, and passions that identify and confirm the bloodline! Simply put, legacy is the full expression of the phrase, “Like father, like son!” 

 You will find the chronicle of Cain in the 4th chapter of the book of Genesis. The antagonistic relationship he had with his brother. The unacceptable disposition of both wanting and having to do things his way. His implacability or unwillingness to come into covenant with God and offer up a proper sacrifice. The crime of passion that he committed because of jealousy. The loss of his identity from being banished from the presence of God and disconnected from his purpose, and the mental instability caused by the mark on his head that became a constant reminder of what he did and what he’s running from! This is the concept of the Cain Mentality, and this is the legacy left by a rebel!

 

THE MAN IN THE MIRROR

Cain is the man in the mirror! Go ahead! Take a look! Looking in the mirror is how you'll know if you fit this description because chances are, he'll be staring right back at you! Here is how you can tell! Cain was, is, and has always been a man of unchecked passion! Because of that, he has always gotten himself into trouble! If it’s not jealousy, it's anger! If it’s not anger, it’s greed! If it’s not greed, it’s hunger! If it’s not hunger, it’s lust; if it’s not lust, it’s love! Now if the shoe fits my brother, you've probably been wearing it since the day you were born!

Cain was, is, and has always been driven by his desires and was, is, and has always been willing to do what he has to do to fulfill those desires! Cain was, is, and has always been insatiable! Nothing can quench his thirst because he doesn’t know what he’s thirsty for! Nothing can stop his hunger because he doesn’t know what he’s hungry for! Nothing can calm his nerves because he doesn’t know what he’s nervous about, and nothing can slow him down, because he doesn’t know why he’s running, where he’s running to, and what he’s running from! Cain is that man in the mirror! The question is, Are you the man he's looking back at? 

 

The irony of who Cain was, is, and, has always been, is that despite his so-called success, his birth will not go down in history as a day of celebration, it will go down as a day of infamy! Why! Because Cain and his descendants are simultaneously responsible for some of the greatest achievements and some of the worst atrocities mankind has ever known! Fame becomes infamy when you're known for what you do or did wrong, more than for what you do or did right! Without equivocation, what you do or did wrong will make a bigger impact, leave a bigger impression, and have more influence on you, your family and friends, and the generations to come! Why? Because when Cain screws up, he screws up big time! In other words, you can do good and even great things and still be a loser, then pass it on to your children, your children’s children, and so on until someone gets set free! Alright, let’s do a quick review! 

Hey Bruh, this is a good place to stop. But again, let me encourage you to stay with me in this series because what I’m sharing with you is what I have experienced living with the Cain Mentality! That means I can tell you how you got it, what it does to your life, and how God’s grace and mercy will bring you out of that mentality! Listen, I never had a comeback because I can’t remember ever being in the light before I was in the darkness! I always tell people that I had a brought back! Why? Because God brought me out of that darkness into His marvelous light! And my brother He will do the same for you!

Part III: Brought Back Life

Now in part III of The Cain Mentality, I will share with you the plight of a man who is driven by the Cain Mentality and how the grace of God delivers him. I am willing to share this part of my life story with you because I want to show you how God can do what you can't do to set you free from this mentality! Part III will be posted in the week of 1/1/24 so again stay with me, leave a comment, and share this blog with others! Until then HAPPY NEW YEAR! BE GOOD, BE BLESSED! AND REMEMBER, JESUS IS LORD!  PEACE! 

The "Cain Mentality": A Rebel Just Because

Hey Bruh! Today I want to present to you my thesis on what I call the Cain Mentality! Why? Because now is the time and today is the day for the man who we consider to be the prodigal son to shake himself, come to his senses, and then return to his rightful place in his family and in society! In the series, we will take a deep dive into the concept, mindset, ineffectiveness, and restoration of someone who has been running from vengeance, dodging fatally, bucking the system, and doing things his way, since the day he killed his brother and became public enemy #1, so we can answer that age-old question, can Cain be saved? That answer is unequivocal! And that answer is YES! 

Immature Men are a Menace to Society

It’s not that he is a bad dude. It’s the fact that he thinks he is, he wants to be and is trying to be identified as someone to be respected but feared, who needs to be acknowledged but wants to be left alone, and someone who demands recognition for what he has accomplished even though he realizes that his success was gotten illegitimately!

Now not every man who is acting immaturely or has some form of questionable success has the "Cain Mentality," however, there are indicators that both identify and confirm who does. Nevertheless, in today’s society, he can be found everywhere you go! You either are or were somebody, you know somebody, or you know somebody that knows somebody who fits that description or who could literally be Cain in the flesh.

Cain is  here, lurking in the shadows 

In other words, He’s out there! You’ve seen him! His presence is pervasive, but his purpose is unclear! He has no allegiance, but he belongs to a fraternity that is known for being a menace to society. 

The Distortion of Masculinity in the Man-Hating Era

What that means for America specifically, is that from the trap house to the white house these men have found a way to distort the definition of masculinity and relegate manhood to animalistic behavior! As a result, this has created a new sport called “Man Hating.”

This sport consists of men being held accountable for what other men have done, being distrusted, or mistrusted because all men can’t be trusted, and being disrespected because you’re a man, regardless of whether you’re guilty of anything or not! Then finally if you make a mistake or do something wrong you won’t find forgiveness and saying you're sorry will never be enough. Why? That’s because "men are to blame," for every problem in this world! My Brother, if you know what I’m talking about, you don’t have to say a word, just shake your head. Alright!

What is the "Cain Mentality"

Ever been mad at God?

The Cain Mentality is defined as a mindset of general disrespect for authority, but an acute disrespect for authority figures! An enigmatic phenomenon that causes the uniquely gifted and the multitalented to live a life of failure rather than a life of success, and a disposition of inferiority that makes a man want to kill his brother because he did the right thing!

Cain is described as a lawless drifter with a God complex whose grandiose delusions, ill-conceived plans, and crocked schemes keep him running from something he cannot describe and running to a place he cannot find! That thing is called vengeance and that place he is running to is called nowhere. Fueled by anger and lost without cause, those that fall victim to the Cain Mentality are merely a rebel just because. An example of the Cain Mentality can be seen in Jim Stark, the main and troubled young character in the 1955 movie Rebel Without a Cause.

Jim Stark in Rebel Without a Cause

A Lack of Purpose Leads to a Life of Abuse

Myles Monroe, a Bahamian Evangelical Christian minister once stated that "nothing in life is without purpose but when the purpose is not known, abuse is inevitable."

The inevitable abuse that a man who is disconnected from his purpose both causes and suffers from are the indicators that help to identify and confirm those who are driven by the "Cain Mentality."

However, the indicator that distinguishes him the most is his unyielding and unrepented determination to do things his way! “I’m gonna do this my way,” is that hardheadedness that refuses wise counsel. It’s that "You can’t tell me nothing, I got this, I don’t need no help," disposition that has caused him to lose everything. It is what makes him live recklessly, check out of life, and become a danger unto himself and to everyone that he comes into contact with. 

If you're interested in learning more about purpose and what you can do to start reconnecting with your own, check out this video where I dive deep into my story and how I was able to reconnect to purpose with the help of God's Grace. 

Alright. If you've made it this far, we've covered a lot of ground. Let's do a quick review of what we've learned about the "Cain Mentality."

Hey Bruh, this is a good place to stop. But let me encourage you to stay with me in this series because what I’m sharing with you is what I have experienced living with the Cain Mentality! That means I can tell you how you got it, what it does to your life, and how God’s grace and mercy will bring you out of that mentality! Listen, I never had a comeback because I can’t remember ever being in the light before I was in the darkness! I always tell people that I had a brought back! Why? Because God brought me out of that darkness into His marvelous light! And my brother He will do the same for you!

Now in part II of The Cain Mentality, I will explain the concept by describing who Cain was and is, how his presence has endured throughout history, and the impact that his presence has had on society from generation to generation! Part II will be posted in the week of 8/7/23 so again stay with me, leave a comment, and share this blog with others! Until then BE GOOD AND BE BLESSED! PEACE! 

GET MAD BUT DON'T GET IGNORANT PART VII

Hey Bruh! In part 6, we left off discussing the steps you need to help conquer your fear, overcome your trust issues, and turn down the intensity of your anger! This concept is what I call the Pursuit of Perfection. Now don't get stuck on the word perfection, place your focus on the word pursuit! In other words, trust the process!  Put in the work and you will get the results that prove you're becoming the man you're supposed to be! So let me remind you again, that the ultimate goal is to get mad, but we don't want to get ignorant! Below are the rest of the steps you need to take on your Pursuit of Perfection. 

STEP #3 IF IT'S NOT YOURS, GIVE IT BACK! IF IT'S YOURS, YOU HAVE MORE THAN ENOUGH, SO SHARE! 

It’s always better to give than to receive! But the rivalry between Cain and Abel was ignited by the pain of not just wanting what your brother has but also wanting back what your brother took from you! That pain can be intensified by the assumption that you could never have what he has or the presumption that you could never get back what he took! Simply put, in an adaptation of the immortal words of Eddie Murphy on his Delirious Comedy Tour: 

“I got some ice cream, I took your ice cream, and you don’t have none. Now you don’t have none! Want a lick...SIKE!”

Everyone has the right to get what they desire, however not by any means necessary! Now as painful and unquenchable as that desire can be, it is made worse by jealousy and the ignorance it unleashes! That is why Abel is dead and his posterity is still trying to get revenge!

We understand that when this happened, vengeance was based upon the perpetration of the crime of murder! Murder is defined as the voluntary or involuntary unlawful termination of life! Since then, we have come to understand that Abel’s murder was based upon his unauthorized takeover of a position of favor! So, the crime that was committed had to do with Cain’s right to a livelihood over Abel’s right to live or to have his being! That means Cain committed this homicide because he believed that Abel took something that rightfully belonged to him which would keep him from the benefits that come from a position of favor! That provoked him to jealousy, and jealousy drove him to get it back by any means necessary!

Abel’s perspective was different! He knew the position of favor he had was something that Cain desired immensely! But Abel believed it was his because his brother did things his way and was not accepted by the Father! This made Abel’s presence a provocateur! He may or may not have gloated about his position of favor, but that position is what Cain wanted more than anything else and Abel being in that position is what got him killed! Now, his posterity wants revenge because Cain killed Abel or took away his presence in a failed attempt to get back the position of favor he lost by abdication and what his posterity has lost by default!

This means that Abel is coming after Cain for something that they both had a right to! The problem is that one of them took it, his posterity wants it back, and they are willing to get it back by any means necessary! The other one lost it and tried to take it back! His posterity wants what it never had and is willing to get it by any means necessary! Wow! That’s a lot. But how different would the outcome have been if Abel was willing to give back what he took, and Cain was willing to share what he lost? Think about what you have that may be provoking you brother or what you don’t have that provokes you to be jealous! Is there a compromise that can end the rivalry, stop the war, and save lives? In other words, if it’s not yours give it back! If it is yours, you have more than enough, so share!

 

STEP#4 STOP ACTING LIKE AN ANIMAL! 

The word “dawg” is a moniker that has been bestowed upon manhood which is both a term of endearment and a derogatory expression! It is a nickname that has been used to equate the temperament of a man with the instinct of an animal! It has been given the power to validate or invalidate masculinity in this culture depending upon the perspective of the people who have had the pleasure or the misfortune to participate in or be victimized by this disposition! In other words, based on the opinion of those affected by what men think, say, and do!

The word "dawg" is not just a descriptor of male tendencies, it is a formal accusation that men act like animals. While that is unacceptable, it has been celebrated and normalized in society for thousands of years! This alternate reality is pervasive all over this country. From coast to coast, here are some examples of how men's behaviors have been consistently reduced to animalistic tendencies:

-In the words of George Clinton, we chase the cat like an Atomic Dog! 

-We "wolf down" our food!

-We “piss like a racehorse!” 

-We compete in “beast mode!”

-We "run like a cheetah!”

-We’re told to fight “like a lion!” 

The problem with men acting like animals is that throughout our history, this beast-like behavior has just about brought this country to its knees. We are MEN, not ANIMALS! Isn’t it well past time to tame the beast? Here’s how:

WAYS TO TAME THE BEAST

1. Stop being ignorant and get your anger under control!

2. Stop running around with "dawgs!" Change the company you keep!

3. Stop calling yourself a "dawg!" Call yourself a man and you'll start acting like one!

4. Stop chasing cars! Start following wise counsel! 

5. Stop all that barking! Your words create your reality!

6. Stop letting people yank your chain! Stop letting everything get under your skin!

7. Stop sniffing in places where you don’t belong!

8. Stop hand biting! Stop dissing those who care about you!

9. Stop wolfing down your food! Learn to curb your appetite!

10. Stop howling at the moon! Stop wasting time on things you can't change and start changing things you have control of!

 

STEP #5 TO EARN TRUST YOU MUST LEARN TO TRUST! 

Trust issues are not uncommon in rivalries! Suspicion unleashes a “get them before they get you” mentality and paranoia can cause you to sleep in a chair with one eye open and your back against the wall or with your weapon in your hand and your finger on the trigger after you have the closed all the curtains and turned off all the lights! But just like with Cain and Abel, the consequence of committing a homicide and destroying a livelihood is that vengeance will track you down and the thought of that will make you believe that everyone you encounter is coming to get you, whether they are or not! Now since vengeance has no regard for human life, it just won’t stop with you! Someone with nothing to do with the beef you’re in can be going about their business and get killed or lose their livelihood by an act of payback that had your name on it! This is what we call the collateral consequence of ignorance!

The friction created by the coagulated blood that clogs the gears of this war has sparked an inferno that reached an intensity or a heat level so high that it can cremate or vaporizes on contact the component that holds our relationships together! That component is the element of trust! If you don’t trust, you don’t have relationships! If you won’t trust, you won’t have relationships! If you can’t trust you can’t have relationships! Plain a simple! But I don’t know if men understand that trust is like the grease that lubricates the gears of an engine! It keeps it running smoothly, reduces friction, and keeps the internal temperature or the intensity of the heat at normal levels!

Men we need to learn to trust others so that we can earn the trust of others! However, this is not easy when you have been let down! This is easier said than done when you have been lied to, and it is “damn near” impossible when you have been stabbed in the back and got vengeance on your mind! But fortunately, we can learn to trust and earn trust even when we are in the most intense battle of our lives!

HOW TO LEARN TO TRUST AND EARN TRUST

Social distance yourselves! Time and space will always allow the intensity to cool down, the ignorance to subside, and your anger to be controlled! Then when clearer heads prevail, you can work on yourself in preparation to work on relationships!

Shut up and let it die! The biggest reason why disagreement gets turned into beef, misunderstanding gets turned into an argument, and hearsay gets turned into an assault is the fact that we just can’t stop running our mouths about it! We have to tell people how we got disrespected and that turns up the intensity because of the instigation you get from the people you told! Words create our reality! If we ever get that revelation, we will know that our words can add fuel or water to the fire! That means respect for yourself, and others starts by watching what you say, how you say it, when to say it, or not say anything at all! Now go look in the mirror and tell yourself to shut up and let it die!

Accept that people have a right to say what they want! That’s a very difficult thing to do in today’s society, especially when you are being challenged! However, you need to understand that one of the biggest signs that people respect you, your position, or both is the fact that they are challenging you for it, or in the words of one of the most influential rappers of all time Ludacris, "They're coming for that #1spot!" What’s disrespectful is all the trash talk, bloviating, banter, and foolishness that comes out of their mouth!

Now, Cain, you can go in their mouth and rearrange their dental work, and Abel, you can video it and show it live on the internet, either way, your challenger will win because in today’s society being an idiot will get you paid! Take a breath, show some respect for others’ point of view because there could be some truth to it, offer to show them how to get where you are, or hook them up with someone who can, but set some boundaries with that offer and keep your end of the bargain! The trash talk might slow down but probably won’t stop; however, you have now earned their trust! 

This will be the final post on this subject for now. I appreciate all of you for joining me on the "Get Mad But Don't Get Ignorant" series. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did! Now I know this series wasn't exhaustive, but we have plenty of time to touch on all the issues men face in future posts on MANHOODREDISCOVERED, so please be patient and keep following us! 

My next series is called, "The younger they are the harder they fall!" Part I of this III part series will be launched and posted in the week of 6/4/23. I will be dealing with the heartbreaking issue of children and the loss of innocence! This is a generation that has experienced more than any other generation before them including active shooter drills! 

In the meantime, make sure you are following me on social media @SavingCain where I'll be launching "Special Alerts" soon. I hope to see you there!✌🏾